Why am I writing this Blog?

I’ve had quite the journey. There have been so many moments along the way that I have felt lost, and I’ve had to find ways to get out of that “lost-ness”. History has made my life difficult, but we all have our challenges, right? The real challenge is moving forward and not getting stuck in the muck of the negative feelings.

So, I am going to start writing about my journey with the hope and the purpose of dealing with my feelings and maybe, just maybe, I’ll inspire and help someone else along the way.

For some reason, and it must be my past, I have a strong resolution to push forward. I haven’t always felt this way. There were years where I simply dealt with situations by reacting, not resolving. I’m learning to deal and not simply react. It’s a process of learning and growing through the pain. I have a LOT of help. Friends. Family. Fabulous people in my life who contribute to my healing. The hard part has been learning to reach out and work through the pain. Recognize the emotion and learn how to solve the problem. I’m a work in progress, as we all are. A beautiful creation of our Makers beauty. Time to recognize that I’m not truly alone.

I grew up as an only child in a home with strong parents who were driven to succeed. I understand that their background is why and what drove their passion. The problem was that I didn’t pick up on dealing with my emotions in a healthy way. So, now, as an adult, it’s time to put my ‘big girl’ panties on and figure out where I can do the work to find the woman I know I can and want to be. Confident, loving, compassionate and wise.

I hope you might find your path as I write about how I discovered, and am still discovering, mine.

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Not Everyone is Like Me

I volunteered at the Flying Pig this year at the Delete Blood Cancer booth to encourage people to sign up to be a marrow donor. Our goal was 1000 swabs and we reached and exceeded our goal! It’s a simple swab of the inside of your mouth, nothing else, to save a life.  (Curious? www.deletebloodcancer.org).

While I was volunteering, thoughts were, what motivates one person to be a giver and the other to not to consider giving in any manner at all? Is it genetic? I tend to give and give of my time, my energy and my thoughts. I share, help and reach out. There are others that I know, even those who I know very well, who have never donated time or money. Ever. I was so angry watching so many people walk by and not even take notice. So often I wonder and wonder why others just don’t care!

We’re all different, and what is especially hard for me is to remember that not everyone is like me. Only I see the world through my eyes. Others have a different view. Their eyesight is their own, and their emotions are affected differently by their surroundings and what is happening to them. Who knows what is motivating each of their steps. Which of them is guided by fear or being influenced by someone else’s choices in their lives.  I need to remind myself that I and they are unique.

Everyone’s situation is unique. Whether it’s how you invest your time or your money. Each situation ought to be reviewed and evaluated so that the individual is comfortable with their choices. Give or not. Invest aggressively or conservatively. We’re all unique and we need to do what will make us happy.

Delayed Gratification

What? Delay gratification? What are you talking about?

In The Marshmallow Experiment researchers gave small children a marshmallow and told them that if they could wait for 15 mins and not eat it, they could have two when the researcher returned. Then they found by checking on those children later in life, that those who were able to wait longer for the reward tended to have better life outcomes, as measured by SAT scoreseducational attainment, body mass index (BMI),  and other life measures. These kids were successful in life. 

We try with all our might, but most of us will eat the marshmallow. 2 out of 3 of us will not wait. 

Self discipline…the most important factor for success. Whether it is in training, learning or understanding the hard work that goes into eventual success, self discipline is the key to making choices that will last a lifetime. Health and wellness, education and finances.

In this world of instant gratification, I wonder what our kids will be like as adults? Instant messages, instant information, Instagram, INSTANTLY. Facebook, Twitter, Texts, Tumbler, Fast food.  How can we teach our kids and ourselves to be disciplined in a world where “instant” is the “name of the game”?

Retirement is a long way away. Putting away money for our future now instead of buying those expensive shoes, purse, watch, car….equals great retirement. To truly discipline ourselves to put money away today, tomorrow and on a regular basis in order to ensure that tomorrow will be a great day, even better than today, we must be disciplined and know that the reward is worth the sacrifice today. 

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