I’ve had quite the journey. There have been so many moments along the way that I have felt lost, and I’ve had to find ways to get out of that “lost-ness”. History has made my life difficult, but we all have our challenges, right? The real challenge is moving forward and not getting stuck in the muck of the negative feelings.
So, I am going to start writing about my journey with the hope and the purpose of dealing with my feelings and maybe, just maybe, I’ll inspire and help someone else along the way.
For some reason, and it must be my past, I have a strong resolution to push forward. I haven’t always felt this way. There were years where I simply dealt with situations by reacting, not resolving. I’m learning to deal and not simply react. It’s a process of learning and growing through the pain. I have a LOT of help. Friends. Family. Fabulous people in my life who contribute to my healing. The hard part has been learning to reach out and work through the pain. Recognize the emotion and learn how to solve the problem. I’m a work in progress, as we all are. A beautiful creation of our Makers beauty. Time to recognize that I’m not truly alone.
I grew up as an only child in a home with strong parents who were driven to succeed. I understand that their background is why and what drove their passion. The problem was that I didn’t pick up on dealing with my emotions in a healthy way. So, now, as an adult, it’s time to put my ‘big girl’ panties on and figure out where I can do the work to find the woman I know I can and want to be. Confident, loving, compassionate and wise.
I hope you might find your path as I write about how I discovered, and am still discovering, mine.
I volunteered at the Flying Pig this year at the Delete Blood Cancer booth to encourage people to sign up to be a marrow donor. Our goal was 1000 swabs and we reached and exceeded our goal! It’s a simple swab of the inside of your mouth, nothing else, to save a life. (Curious? www.deletebloodcancer.org).
While I was volunteering, thoughts were, what motivates one person to be a giver and the other to not to consider giving in any manner at all? Is it genetic? I tend to give and give of my time, my energy and my thoughts. I share, help and reach out. There are others that I know, even those who I know very well, who have never donated time or money. Ever. I was so angry watching so many people walk by and not even take notice. So often I wonder and wonder why others just don’t care!
We’re all different, and what is especially hard for me is to remember that not everyone is like me. Only I see the world through my eyes. Others have a different view. Their eyesight is their own, and their emotions are affected differently by their surroundings and what is happening to them. Who knows what is motivating each of their steps. Which of them is guided by fear or being influenced by someone else’s choices in their lives. I need to remind myself that I and they are unique.
Everyone’s situation is unique. Whether it’s how you invest your time or your money. Each situation ought to be reviewed and evaluated so that the individual is comfortable with their choices. Give or not. Invest aggressively or conservatively. We’re all unique and we need to do what will make us happy.
I was reading an article about re-balancing. It was about retirement accounts (IRA’s and 401(k)’s) and how to re-balance, when to re-balance, and which percentages you should use at which age to have the perfect balance in your portfolio. Interesting. As a financial advisor this is something I do regularly.
However, my thoughts went further. What about the balance you have as a human being in your everyday life? Are you creating enough time for the things that are truly important to you? Family? Friends? Fun? Relaxation? Worship?
I have always made enough time for family. But is it the right amount of time? Am I giving too much? Doing to much? I needed time to reflect and decide what is right for me. I also recently had to throw out a perfectly good friendship because it was draining my energy. Energy that I needed for other things. Friends should encourage and uplift. Motivate and support and create a little drive! Not constantly complain and whine. I had to create a calendar in order to make room for fun. Seriously, it had become a problem, I was working all the time. I’m still trying that one on for size and need to work on it harder! I had to time block downtime, time to do nothing but reflect and look inward at what can be improved and be grateful for what I love about me. Also to take time to focus on exercise to help me manage stress. I had also gotten away from taking out time for gratitude and prayer. My life needed serious re-balancing!
As the song says, take a good look at you now. How much has your life gotten out of balance? Reflect on what you could do better and give yourself a break! Your whole world will be better if you yourself are in balance.